Answering the “Herald’s Call” Part II

In my last post, I talked about “answering the “herald’s call” and the unexpected turn that doing so caused me to take in my journey. It resulted in an almost complete about face for me. Hearing that call, sitting with it’s message, and finally harkening to it’s words has been both scary and exhilarating. The longer I sit with that call and that inner voice deep within, the more assured I become that I AM on the right path, that I AM divinely guided and inspired and most importantly that I AM loved and cherished.

I have realized over the course of the past couple of week’s, that the voice of the herald is neither unfamiliar, nor surprising. I have heard its gentle call for many years now and dismissed it, hushed it, or buried it beneath contrived business and multitasking. I cannot do it any longer. That quiet gentle voice has become a shout! “Do it now!” “Stop hiding, making excuses, keeping yourself genuinely (or artificially) busy and do that one thing you have known for years you were born to do! Step out of the shadows and into the light of who you truly are.”

But sometimes, the shadows feel like such a safe place. I can remain invisible when I choose, and peek out when I choose. And when I am really feeling brave, I can step out into the light. Even writing those words feels somehow less than honest, and inauthentic. People have always said that I have such a “big” personality, that I have “such a presence” And that is likely true from their vantage point, because that’s what I made a conscious effort to show them. Truth be told, I have been in hiding for a very long time. Hiding behind the brave, extroverted mask I created and have worn for far too long. For such a long time it felt safe, comfortable, and necessary. It fit like a glove. Now, it chafes and itches and has become almost intolerable. It no longer fits as it once did and I feel the choice I must make now is either to fashion a new one that fits better, or discard it and stand bare-faced and exposed before the world. I choose the latter. I feel grateful for the inner courage and fortitude to make that choice.

So what is this “one thing” that I have felt a call to do for so very long? I will lay my soul bare and I will tell you. It is to write. Books, and articles, and blogs, and scores of private journals. I have known for a very long time that my story is far from ordinary, and in many ways, quite remarkable. But it isn’t about telling my story for the sake of the telling. It’s about the hope and rising from despair, it’s about the evolution from victimization to victorious, empowered womanhood. It’s about healing with love and help from others, and it’s about enduring many, many dark nights of the soul when I was sure I was alone and abandoned in the world yet somehow rising to greet yet another day. Though admittedly, sometimes pissed as hell that I actually awoke to see another sunrise.

I have been granted many more sunrises since those dark days, and for the most part, I’ve been grateful for each one. I now find myself at this place in my life now…no longer content or even able to hide, but still somewhat afraid, of being exposed, of not being “good enough” to do what I feel so driven and compelled to do. I have come to realize, it isn’t about whether anyone enjoys, embraces, accepts, or approves of what I do or say; what matters is that I do it, for the sake of satisfying and answering the herald’s call of my own soul.

I have committed to having my first book finished and published before the end of 2020. There. I’ve said it. I’ve publically thrown down the gauntlet for myself, and for all the world to see. I’d be honored to have you along for the ride to see the unfoldment and birthing of this “stepping out of the shadows and into the light” as it were.

Consider subscribing to and following my blog. Feedback and encouragement along this path will always be welcomed, and appreciated.

We Want To Eat Well, Too, When Dining Out!

In this post, I depart a little from my usual high vibe, Law of Attraction writings and offer a wee bit of a rant. I’d apologize if I was actually sorry, but I’m not. If I offend anyone, well, I prefer to ask forgiveness rather than permission. Let me know if I owe you an amends after reading. One will be forthcoming. If you are wondering who “we” are, we are vegan. We eat a strictly plant based diet, for a whole host of very individual reasons.

Some vegans are motivated by personal health reasons, some are guided by the mandates of a particular spiritual path that they follow, others have made the decision based on compassion, for the sake of of the animals affected by humans carnivorous desires. Desires, not to be confused with needs. From a nutritional standpoint, no one needs to consume flesh, or dairy products. (Despite what the powerful lobbies of the Cattlemen’s Association or Dairy Council have paid millions to make you believe.) Still other vegans maintain the lifestyle because it is the most “planet-friendly” and ecologically sound choice for everyone; human and animal.

Is there anything on here I will eat?

I personally, have been vegan for 20+ years, and we (vegans) do a wonderful job cooking for ourselves, our families, and friends at home. We enjoy beautiful, colorful, delicious, and healthy appetizers, soups, salads, entrees, and desserts. Dining out, however…usually falls into one or more the following categories-

• Stressful
• Unpleasant (for the vegan and those dining with)
• Bland and tasteless
• Predictable
• Over or unfairly priced (when substitutions are made or ingredients removed.)

It’s stressful and can be unpleasant when you are planning a meal out, not to know if there will be anything on the menu that you will eat; and not just stressful for you, but also for your dining companions who worry that there will be no offerings for you to choose from, and if you didn’t choose the restaurant, they sometimes feel guilty, as well. Jeez, that sounds like a fun experience!

What is offered, is often bland, tasteless, and oh so predictable. The exchange with your server can sound a lot like this-

• “We have salad.” (I am not a rabbit, I am a vegan!) And very often there is one dressing to choose from that is dairy free; Italian, which I don’t especially care for. Most salads these days come with meat or cheese in them and even if you asked to have it removed, the price of the dish remains the same.
• “You could order fries or a baked potato.” Hmmmmm, whole lot of nutrition going on there! And what shall I put on that a la carte potato, sour cream? Butter?
• “We have a veggie burger!” Oh yay! (This is my least favorite response, by the way, as I have choked down so many really bad veggie burgers.) While my companions are dining on freshly prepared food, I will do my best to muster my way through a frozen, then microwaved veggie burger, many of which are made with egg, and act like I am enjoying it.
• “I’m sorry, we just really don’t have anything.” Translation-We don’t have anything at all that does not have meat, fish, cheese or other forms of dairy in it, and the kitchen is unwilling to make accommodations.

I have often felt empathy for the server, too.
It puts them in an awkward, difficult situation as well.

It doesn’t have to be this way. With a little forethought and creativity, almost any restaurant could offer at least a few delicious, healthy, freshly prepared dishes for vegan patrons. With information so readily available on the Internet, vegan recipes are easy to find and most often, easily prepared as well. It just takes a little thought and planning. So much effort, creativity, and culinary talent is put into creating menus for the general public, it would be wonderful to have the same energy directed toward the creation of a vegan menu. We would like to enjoy eating out, too!

My future daughter-in-law is the chef, menu creator, and person in charge of ordering at two local restaurants. One, a fine dining establishment, and the other is more of a pub type atmosphere. Last year, she and I worked together to create some vegan menu options for both locations. The menus did very well once introduced and continue to do so a year later! Best of all, it was easy, hassle free, and the change has seen many vegan patrons pleasantly surprised! Now, in our area, which is not exactly robust with dining out options, groups of diners with a vegan or two in their party are much more likely to choose either of these two restaurants so that everyone can enjoy their meal. Restaurateurs, are you listening?

Yup! It’s 100% Vegan.

It doesn’t even mean having to redo the entire menu. Perhaps just a line at the bottom of the regular menu saying something along the lines of “Ask your server for our vegan menu.” Or, just print out a 5″x7″ one and tuck it right inside the regular menu, so it doesn’t seem so much like an afterthought. This was the solution that the two previously mentioned restaurants opted for.

This past weekend, I went out with my daughter to a new, and lovely little bistro that opened up a couple of months ago in our area. I was excited to visit. It was delightful! Chic in it’s design, super friendly staff and management, great atmosphere,and amazing cocktail offerings. I assumed since it was attached to a wellness center offering yoga and the like, I would have no problem finding vegan options. Once again, I was disappointed. Not a single one to be found on the menu. However, much to their credit, they allowed me to pick and choose vegan items from other gourmet sandwiches and create my own. I also ordered onion rings, which came highly recommended, and a member of the kitchen staff was thoughtful enough to come out and let me know that they were not vegan. He then offered a substitute. Bravo! Well done! The sandwich I created, with lots of tempeh, yummy pesto and veggies was absolutely delicious! Their willingness to make accommodations and substitutions was truly refreshing, and very much appreciated.

That said, it still would have been nice to have even just a few vegan options already on the menu to choose from, and avoid everyone having to scramble and figure out what to offer “the vegan”. Even fellow patrons chimed in with suggestions! (Adorable, but just a teeny bit embarrassing, too.) Because they were so accommodating, I definitely plan to return.

Anyway, thanks for listening. I appreciate your time and your ear. And I’m just going to throw this out there, if your in the restaurant business, I am more than happy to help you bring this much needed change to your establishment. Feel free to shoot me an email- esme@esmewest.com It’s an idea whose time has come, and actually, is long overdue. C’mon folks, even Burger King, McDonald’s and KFC have made changes to their menus to accommodate veg heads. Surely quality restaurants can do better!

Are you vegan, looking for new recipes to try? Or not vegan , but wondering if plant based options can really taste good? I’d love to recommend one of my very favorite websites “Minimalist Baker” Minimalist Baker is a place for recipes requiring 10 ingredients or less, 1 bowl, or 30 minutes or less to prepare. All eaters are welcome. (Not all recipes are vegan, but the majority are, or are vegetarian.) If you have a plant based kitchen, chances are, you already have most of the ingredients on hand! I welcome your comments and feedback.

MasterKey Experience- Week 17/18-*The Herald’s Call

*Also known as the end of the line for me. Week’s 17HJ and Week 18 took an unexpected turn in my journey. There had been a growing dissonance within me for several weeks surrounding the constant “doing” which, for me, was crowding out time usually carved out for “being”. It began to feel less and less aligned with who I AM at a soul level. A feeling which was neither comfortable, nor acceptable.

As we were told in the Week 17 HJ webinar, the “herald” is our own inner voice, or as I have come to know it, my Inner Being, which is always and ever connected to Source. When I stilled all of the outer voices and ceased the “doing” for a moment or two and really listened the voice of The Herald, I realized I had reached my exit point.

There are so many things that I will be forever grateful for as a result of having been part of the Master Key Experience- all of the wonderful people I met and Masterminded with, my awesome guide, Jen, who was so instrumental in helping me get my DMP hammered out, Mark & Davene, and the wonderful time we shared together on Kauai! They are such gracious hosts!

I AM so thankful for having been introduced to Og Mandino, Earl Nightingale and others, and although I never thought I would say this..the endless stacks of index cards! Having created over 400 of them, they have become an integral part of my daily spiritual practices, and shuffling through them always brings a smile of joy to my face!

I continue my personal journey of service always, manifesting greatness, joy, and the fulfillment of all of my dreams as I continue to travel the road to happy destiny!

Master Key Experience- Week 17-Be “There” Now!

Before I launch into the actual topic of these week’s post, let me just say, that last week which was focused on kindness, was phenomenal! The collective energy created by 300+ people, singly focused on observing acts of kindness, performing acts of kindness for others and to themselves was positively electric! It changed my week and I believe, my life. It was such a tangible way to experience one of the “7 Laws of the Mind”-What we think about grows, what we forget about atrophies. Because I, and so many others were singly focused on kindness, it just seemed to be everywhere! It reminded me of when I was pregnant each time (7 times in total!). Prior to receiving the news that I had conceived, I rarely saw other pregnant women. Once my own pregnancy was confirmed, it seemed like everyone was pregnant! (Ok…fine, not everyone, just the women.) Why? Because my conscious, and subconscious mind were so focused on the life growing within me.

Dr. Wayne Dyer was famous for saying “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at will change.” I AM so grateful for last week’s exercise. Kindness is everywhere…you only have to choose to see it, to be it.

Okay! I digress. On to the actual focus of this week’s post. I fully realize that the spiritual cry these days is to be “fully present in the now” and I embrace that philosophy as well…to a degree. I even have a clock that hangs on the wall in my practice, encouraging that mindset; that looks exactly like the one to the left.

Of course, I want to savor every moment of the here and now, and I make every effort to do so, but I AM a creature of duality, and I know that it is possible to be fully present in the beauty of this present moment, while employing both my conscious and subconscious mind to realize my future life and future self now. Calling in to existence that which does not yet exist, is how everything that we now know, see, taste, touch and feel in the material, physical world, was brought into being. Someone dreamed it, someone imagined it into being. By utilizing intense focus, visualization, and creating accurate, concise word pictures, they were able to make that which was not, be called into being by the power of the subconscious mind. The subconscious mind had accepted; as reality, the substance of the dream, and worked tirelessly, unceasingly, with the Law of Attraction, orchestrating with great precision, and perfection, all that was needed to bring the thing focused on, into reality in the material world. Think-the Wright Brothers and the dream of man flying, think Henry Ford and his dream of the automobile, think Benjamin Franklin and his dream of harnessing the power of electricity. The list could go on and on. Great thinkers and visionaries down through the ages, all dreaming into being the things that we are surrounded by in our day to day lives.

Ford’s First Car-The Henry Ford

The point is, before they could call into being, and cause the creation of the “thing”, there had to be a dream, and a firmly held, unshakable belief that it could be. If the Wright Brothers had never entertained the possibility of man flying, and believed fully that it were somehow possible, there would never have been an airplane. Everything in our world was dreamed of, thought of, and spoken into existence. Everything. There are no exceptions.

Following in the footsteps of great visionaries, thinkers, and dreamers; I, too, have put my subconscious mind to work by painstakingly training it to believe fully in my future, my future self, my future dream, and accepting it as reality, now, thereby causing it to work 24/7 to orchestrate all that is needed to “call that which is not as though it were.” Last night, to reinforce all of the other daily mind exercises I am doing, I redecorated my home. I know, it doesn’t sound like a big deal. But in so doing, I wedded my future reality to my present world with visible, tangible things to saturate my mind, and my consciousness with what is being created. My home in Oak Creek, AZ, becomes more and more a reality in my life each and every day.

As of last night, I sleep under the desert moon and stars every night…now. I snuggle and dream under a Southwest motif comforter, while diffusing essential oils of sage and juniper. I AM in Arizona all night long…now.

The space I occupy to do my daily readings, meditate and dream, has also been transformed. Other little touches have been added throughout the house. I cannot walk anywhere in my home in Vermont without seeing, feeling, smelling and thinking about Arizona. And I know that thought, charged with feeling is the most powerful, creative force there is. I AM employing total saturation of my conscious, and subconscious mind, 24/7. Although the following statement may seem like a paradox, it is not. I AM here now, and here…is there.

If that’s a little mind bending, consider this. The picture on the right was taken 2 years ago there, near one of the energy vortices at the base of Bell Rock, just outside of Oak Creek AZ. Clearly, I was there. Now, it sits beside me during meditation, and when I am fully relaxed, I can feel the desert sun on my skin, smell the juniper in the trees, hear the sound of my own Native American flute, see the clear, azure blue, cloudless skies overhead…and I AM, in this present “now” moment, there again. And I also know that because of the cooperation of my subconscious mind with the unfailing Law of Attraction, I AM also there in the future that is being created now!

Just let that sink in for a moment. Kind of trippy, right? But certainly no “trippier” than humans flying, or carriages that move without a horse, or bringing the power of lightning into our homes. Time travel is possible…I know, because I go Back to the Future multiple times every day!

Master Key Experience- Week 16-Kindness;Give More Get More!

Og Mandino is currently telling us, multiple times a day for the past two weeks now, that we ARE nature’s greatest miracle! Reminding us; that we did not come here to be ordinary, we came to make a difference, for ourselves and others! Charles Haanel, in this week’s Master Key has us focusing our thoughts and intentions on Harmony. And now that we have also undertaken the Franklin Makeover , should it come as any surprise that our focal point is Kindness? Don’t ya just love it when a plan comes together?

Best of all, we are not only focusing individually on kindness, we are doing so collectively, all of us, with the same motivation for each and every one across the board! There is so much vibrational power in such an action, we cannot really begin to imagine the ripple effect our actions over the course of this week will have! I AM someone who works with energy as a life path and am well acquainted with the vibrational shifts in energy that can take place, especially when there is a collective consciousness at work! Not only will we be changed this week, but so will the environment that each and every one of us inhabits. The Carpenter stated it this way-“…if two or more of us shall agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for us…”

If what we are asking for, if what we are focusing on, if what we are showing to the world and looking to observe in the world is Kindness, what do you suppose will happen? Well, I can tell you, based on the 7 Laws of the Mind, “what we think about grows; what we forget about atrophies.” Imagine if you will, just for a moment, what it might look like if the entire nation that we live in was part of this grand assignment that we are all blessed to be undertaking this week. The Carpenter could see it. John Lennon could see it, and the little boy in one of my favorite movies ever, Pay It Forward could see it…can you?

Master Key Experience- Week 15- Knowledge Won’t Apply Itself!

I am still here! Still pressing in and moving forward, although, admittedly, there were several times during my journey thus far, I honestly thought, “This is it! I quit! I cannot do this! Thankfully, I was wrong and by the time I began experiencing those thoughts, the new blueprint was ingrained well enough ; that it was a constant, persistent, nag whispering in my ear.

I am finding this to be such an extravagantly rich week in many ways. I AM loving Scroll Four in “Greatest Salesman” and really beginning to make sense of the progression of thoughts leading up to Master Key 15. I was particularly struck by the idea that Knowledge does not apply itself. I have seen this played out many times in my own life, as well as the lives of others. We can read all we want, study all we want, take a hundred classes, workshop and seminars, and without applying the knowledge, be none the better for it and certainly, lighter in the purse or wallet with nothing to show for it except a certificate to hang on the wall.

Without applying the knowledge gained, without action and a plan, and in the absence of real and lasting change, those certificates could just as easily be used for wallpaper! I’ve taught Law of Attraction and manifestation classes for several years, and would always tell the attendees at the end of our workshop, “We’ve had a great time here today, covered a lot of awesome information and principles together, now the ball’s in your court. What will you do with the information? You are certainly free to go home, put away your workbook, handouts and materials, and think to yourself, “Well, that was fun!” And do nothing. And I can promise you, nothing will happen. Nothing bad, nothing good, nothing at all. Nothing changes till something changes! Or, you can go home, and make a decision that when you wake up tomorrow morning, things will be different. You can begin changing your thoughts, your speech, your habits, etc. , and watch what happens!” For those that applied what they learned, I have witnessed amazing transformations, life changes, career changes and more. From those who zealously applied the knowledge. The others, well, I can only hope that a seed was planted that will germinate and bear fruit at some future point. One of those who was ripe for change and success, and applied everything she learned is now a part of the Master Key Experience with the rest of us on this fantastic voyage!

Remembering-Knowledge does not apply itself. It takes desire, work, practice, faith, persistence, and enthusiasm! This is the week that things are really beginning to crystallize for me. The shapes, (I could write an entire blog post on just the shapes!), the readings, the sits, and the index cards!!! Can we just talk about the index cards?? (Probably better not, that would be another blog post, for sure!) Let me just say, that writing things that have to get done on an index card and then promising to do them, will be a lifelong habit…I AM sure of it! Subby is fully on board, and it knows when it sees the index card, or the shapes, or hears the word “And I always keep my promises-Signed Esme West”, things are about to get done!

” …Let the thought dwell on the fact that knowledge does not apply itself. That our actions are not governed by knowledge, but by custom, precedent and habit. That the only way we can get ourselves to apply knowledge is by a determined conscious effort. Call to mind the fact that knowledge unused passes from the mind, that the value of the information is in the application of the principle; continue this line of thought until you gain sufficient insight to formulate a definite program for applying this principle to your own particular problem. “

Master Key System-Charles F. Haanel-Part 15, paragraph 36

Master Key Experience- Week 14-Queen of Myself!

Happy New Year! And welcome to a new year, and the start of a brand new decade! I am so very excited about all the good things to come this year and the nine to follow. On this New year’s Day, I feel as though I am just overflowing with promise and possibility!

The end of 2019 marked a pivotal anniversary for me and I felt the best way to share it here, was to simply copy and paste from my Facebook business page-so here it is.

I AM celebrating…me! Yesterday marked the 2 year anniversary of my moving into the beautiful home that I AM blessed enough to live in, alone. I chose better for myself. I loved and valued myself enough to realize that I deserved only the best that life has to offer, and that I was responsible for my own happiness. So I became the Queen of my own life, and began building my Kingdom.

*I continued the process of deep soul work, allowed healing to come, gave grace to others, who I truly believe were and are doing the best they can, where they are, with what they have. Really, aren’t we all?

* I bought my FIRST EVER brand new car! I paid cash for it and did not bring a Cashier’s Check. I had saved and waited my whole life for this, I wanted to joy of watching them count out, in front of me, hundreds of $100 bills! To this day, I am still filled with so much gratitude every time I get into it!

* I purchased a 34′ motorhome that I actually began manifesting 20 years ago! (Before I ever knew anything manifestation and the Law of Attraction!) If I had gotten out of my own way sooner, It would have arrived sooner!

*I traveled to Madison, VA, Sedona, AZ (twice), New Orleans, Denver, CO, Peru (Sacred Valley), Kauai, HI.

* I became a Certified Infinite Possibilities Trainer, and the following year was a Trailblazer speaker at the annual training event.

* I learned to ace solo travel whether by land, or air.

* In June of this year, I purchased the building that houses my home and my business. Again, so much gratitude every single time I step through the door! It never gets old.

* I have increased my client base, added new services, taught Reiki classes, taught Infinite Possibilities workshops, facilitated our monthly Sacred Drum Circle, continued my Shamanic Training, made so many new friends, re-established healthy relationships with family members, weathered the storms of losing loved ones  , and more.

*If you’ve read this far, and think it all sounds a little “braggy”, I would apologize if I were sorry, but I’m not. We have been culturally programmed and conditioned NOT to love ourselves, NOT to be openly proud of our achievements, NOT to celebrate the awesomeness of our own being! And I, for one am over it!
Someone recently said to me “oh my goodness, you’re such a ‘survivor’ !” There was a time when that was true. I no longer survive…I THRIVE! Nothing but love and gratitude for all of the blessings in my life; physical, material, spiritual, and emotional 

Visible is okay, too!

 ** Teaser- Soon I will begin writing a book. I knew a year ago what the title would be. I’ll share it so you’re sure to recognize it when it is released. It will be called “How I Became the Queen of Myself and Built My Own Kingdom” I’ll be counting on all of you to help make it a bestseller! 

Opening Og Mandino’s- The Greatest Salesman in the World today, was such a beautiful affirmation of so many thoughts, feelings and emotions that I have been swirling around in my head and my heart this past week or so. “You are nature’s greatest miracle.” Thank you, Mr. Mandino. You’re words are always amazing and timely.

 

I Love The Master Key Experience Week 13

Great video post by Tom the Coach…check it out!

Master Key Experience- Week 13-Ho, Ho, Holidays!

Have a Holly, Jolly Crisis, um, I mean Christmas!

Well, I can’t say I wasn’t forewarned. I can’t say that our “Fearless Leader”, Mark, didn’t let us know in advance how difficult it may prove to stay on the straight and narrow path, to maintain our “Mental Diet” and to keep up with all of our exercises during this season of merriment, frivolity, oh, and triggers from beloved family members!

During the Week 13 webinar, when we were being told to stay mindful, stay present, be diligent and be watchful for interactions with some of the same folks who helped form our old blueprint, I remember thinking, “What? Me worry? Psshaw…I got this!”

And then came the recitals, and concerts, and theater performances, and a birthday, and multiple holiday celebrations, and cooking, gift wrapping, card and letter writing, holiday emails, and social media posts. Each one beautiful, and wonderful in it’s own way. But wait…is that my determination and focus I just saw walking out the door? Oh crap! I think it has my success on the “7 Day Mental Diet” tucked neatly under its arm. Wait! Don’t take that! I have logged six days of amazing success and applying the 7 Laws of the Mind and rerouting negative, disempowering thoughts, and substituting positive thoughts, and applying strong emotion, feeling and enthuuuuuuusssiasm to all those glorious thoughts! You bring that back here right now! I persist until I succeed, and surely, I can persist and succeed for just one more day, right? WRONG!

Misunderstandings, miscommunication about expectations, the off-handed, (albeit cleverly disguised) hurtful comment(s), unsolicited opinions and advice, longstanding jockeying for position in the hierarchy of the family, and on, and on, and on it goes. And where does this mother/grandmother find herself squarely situated? Right smack in the middle, overflowing with opinions, and plenty of thoughts that no longer warrant my proudly waving the banner of “7 Day Mental Diet Success”! I have been knocked from my throne. Or have I? Of course, I haven’t. I made a choice. I had all the tools necessary to guarantee my success, and I simply chose not to use them appropriately, and instead, march headlong into the fray, now flying the emblem of “Oops! I did it again!”

So now what? Six glorious days down the drain! I should just sit here and feel sorry for myself, berate and belittle myself, right? Hell no! I got right back up and back in the saddle, ready to ride another day! As I write this, I am now two successful days back on track, with the diet, all my exercises and with a powerful lesson learned. I persist, I win, and I RISE! And for all of the events of the past week…I have nothing but gratitude!

Master Key Experience- Week 12- House of Mirrors

“You can’t be serious? You want me to get out of my comfy office chair in the middle of this webinar, go and look in the mirror and talk to myself for 50 minutes? For real? Alright, I’ll do it because we have all spent 12 weeks building a level of trust, and you haven’t steered me wrong yet, but fifty minutes???” And so dragging my feet, I trudges to the bathroom mirror and begin reciting my one sentence “Billboard DMP”. After five minutes, (rolling eyes) “This is so lame!” I barely want to look in my eyes because I feel so DUMB! The look in my eyes is dull, blank and almost expressionless. But I press on.

After 15 minutes, I decide it’s time to pick myself apart- here’s the list;

• Your hair is out of place (again!)
• Oh my god! Are those two white eyebrow hairs? What the hell?
• This mascara is kind of clumpy.
• Where’s the scissors? That one little section of bangs is too long.
• I am pretty sure, there are more wrinkles on your forehead this year compared to last year, no, not pretty sure…positive. Be honest! Good thing you wear bangs!
• Isn’t it funny how you can only look at one eye at a time? Look how your eyes seem to “jiggle” when you move your focus from one to the other. Neat.

Mind you, now, all of this is a silent dialogue in my head. I am still standing here chanting out loud to myself like an idiot! The dog, gave up on me several minutes ago and left the room. I don’t blame her. I’d like to leave the room!!! The parrot is stuck with me, he’s on my shoulder bearing witness to these shenanigans! But still I press on. And then, suddenly….

There is a shift, I’m not sure if I saw it first or felt it first. All of a sudden, it doesn’t seem so lame. I feel a physical response in my body, a “lightness”. a little bubbly feeling that almost makes me want to giggle. My heart is beating a little faster. My hands are becoming animated and gesturing to punctuate each portion of the sentence. I realize that I am speaking louder and faster; and then I really look into my eyes. They are bright, and shining, and alive with emotion!

What started out as a ridiculous “Oh my gosh, if I have to” exercise, now feels fun and empowering! The longer I keep going, the more I realize, I believe what I am saying! I can feel the excitement and joy in my body! I begin sounding like a cheerleader! In addition to my smile and animated eyes and expression, I add bi-lateral physical movement, and begin touching one hand to the opposite shoulder with each word! The allotted time is just whizzing by now!

When the required fifty minutes have elapsed, I feel invigorated and full of faith. I feel so alive and confident! And grateful; very grateful. Grateful I was given the assignment and grateful that I chose to follow the instructions! I believe I will repeat it again, perhaps not for fifty minutes, but definitely until I see and feel that shift take place!